What do people look for in a mate

Who's not too crazy. But she's gotta be a little crazy or trust me she has no passion for you. This takes care of so many damned problems I swear. Just saying. Is it realistic, no, I know that David. But damn it's magical. But you know, I really believe I mean, don't you dream of a beautiful woman who wants to suck your cock almost nonstop and LOVE doing it?

Don't you want a woman to be utterly grateful and actually MEAN thank you when you do stuff for her? But maybe this will help?

What to Look For in a Partner

Is that fair? Is that right?

It doesn't matter because, that's just the way it is with me. If you know a woman is in love with you David, you can turn her emotional tide with so very little. Believe it or not, having a man I'm in love with just call me sweetheart can turn my anger into lust. Oh yeah, one more thing I had to look up Dunning- Krugerite. That guy the study was based on was deranged. I think you misspelled rectal exocraniectomy. Cause I can't find it anywhere on the net, surprisingly enough.

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Methinks you should give me the correct spelling so I can understand how you're trying to insult me? Oh yes, one more thing I have often wanted to date a psychologist. And you're telling me that a psychologist can't understand women?? Ah, what I would do to be understood. Good night. I would agree about similarity - especially for values and preferences that are important to you. I have been married for almost 20 years to someone from a very different culture. What made this possible is that we share the same values and religion and that we are both high on kindness, loyalty and understanding.

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It would have been easier and less work to be married to somebody more similar, especially since we had a lot of conflicts at the beginning because you do not realize how many assumptions you have of what is normal or expected that are based on your culture and not universal. But, we have both learned from each others culture and our children have the strength of seeing that there are different, but valid ways, of living and two cultures to draw from.

Thanks for a great article, I agree with everything you say but I would add "emotional maturity" to the list. The relationship I'm in now works so well because we are both at the same emotional maturity. I have been in previous relationships where there was a big mismatch in maturity levels, usually I was the emotionally immature one and they were a constant battle. Maturity denotes quantity over quality, and experience influences quality, but quality is more important overall some people learn faster than others. Stability is more important. They list Emotional Stability.

They are almost the same thing in how they influence each other--or people's perception of either, but one is more innately specific about it how it effects interpersonal interaction. Everyone can be immature at times, but are they generally quick to become angry or defensive, or are they easily stressed?

This is a great list! I especially like the point you made about similarities. Although I will say that me and my "sweety-pooh" seem opposite on the surface e. But when you drill down to what we want most in a relationship, you'll find our similarities. For example, we value security, patience, loyalty and compassion in a relationship. At the end of the day no matter how opposite we are when it comes to those traits, we always come together. Philia, Agape, Storge, and Eros I will say this, I think physical attraction is important to a certain extent.

I think the act of making oneself attractive to your partner is also something to reciprocate and is highly mutually beneficial. It should never involve expectations of meeting a standard , but at least knowing what your partner is attracted to and making a deliberate effort to do to what you can and LOVING it at the same time is key. It creates such a sensual dynamic that fuels lots of satisfaction, and its very important.

I've encouraged this for two reasons. One being that she looks masculine in her work uniform, which is understandably unappealing to me. And the other being that one of the things I find attractive is athleticism fitness oriented individuals. She just recently learned the benefits of wearing athleisure attire: it's a turn-on for her mate, and it's insanely comfortable bonus, she exercises more too. I find myself often suggesting that perhaps she's not the best judge of what makes 'her' visually appealing, considering the facts that she's not actually trying to attract women--and she's a woman, and that her mate doesn't find men attractive.

It's not exactly selfless, nor selfish, it's balanced and I do it too. I wouldn't want my wife telling me to wear polyester over cotton, if I found cotton more comfortable. Or to go without a coat or sweater when I'm cold. But she likes the way v-neck shirts compliment my shoulders and chest, so I shop for, buy, and wear v-neck shirts when possible I know people who would be all: be your own person, dress for yourself, who cares what she wants.

They don't have a tendency to have very long lasting or healthy romantic relationships. Or, as my boyfriend's grandfather put it: you don't need someone who's great to look at, but who looks in the same direction as you. Pretty straight on advice, but unfortunately it also depends on the time of life you meet someone. When too young; one tends to be manipulated by a stronger personality. Other times in your life, we tend to want the person to be more like someone that we cared about in our lives and we sometimes think they are what we want them to be rather than who they really are and it will blow up in our faces.

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Telling the Story Numbers Can't. Gwendolyn Seidman Ph. References 1 Buss, D. Be sure to read the following responses to this post by our bloggers:.

A Painful Divorce? Submitted by Neil on February 26, - am. If you loved me, you would TELL me what the hell you want!!! Right on! Submitted by Anonymous on February 26, - pm. Knowing what she wants Submitted by Reilly Hamer on March 3, - am.

Submitted by jenna on April 30, - pm. I hope your new relationship is going well. Have a good one. Jenna needs to give herself a rectal exocraniectomy. Submitted by David N. Andrews M. Jenna Baddeley wrote:. Long time no insult lol.

Similarity Submitted by anonymous on February 26, - pm. Emotional matirity Submitted by Mark on February 26, - pm. Maturity denotes quantity Submitted by ehelldane on February 28, - pm. Immaturity is more opinion based, stability can be quantified. Opposites attract too! Submitted by Love on February 27, - am. Is love possible Submitted by Amit on February 27, - am. Is it possible to love someone without physical relations and sex. Submitted by ehelldane on February 28, - pm. Attraction Submitted by Ben on February 27, - pm.

Exactly Submitted by Tortuga on February 28, - pm.